If only I could remember
by TomKat92
Summary: Kaiba finally realises too late that he has an empty life. But will a mysterious visit from an auburn haired beauty prompt Seto Kaiba to remember the life that he once had with her. If only he could remember where he knew her from.


"Dammit," I growled. I promised to meet my son at this stupid charity concert but a call from our offices in New York has made me run late, a couple of hours late which means this sorry excuse for a concert must be over by now. Not that I was interested in coming in the first place. The only reason I agreed to come was because my son, Syrian had asked especially. To be honest the thought of spending any more time than necessary with his mother, my ex wife, is like a living hell to me. She is so arrogant, preaching, contro-

"You missed it." Huh? Whose voice is that? Turning towards the sound, in front of me is what appears to be a goddess with long auburn hair swaying to her waist. I can't help it but my jaw drops open and I believe I am staring at her in shock and confusion. "The concert, it just finished," she continued. My eyes slowing rise until I am starring her in the face. Her beautiful face. I need to get it together no woman has and ever will have this effect on me. They are all the same in the end, only after my money and my reputation. Something about this woman is so familiar however and I'm sure I know her. A part of me feels like it really knows her on a personnel level. Awkwardly I clear my throat and embarrassingly let out my best and first chuckle for a long time.

"I'm sorry," I stammer, "but where do I know you from?" I can't believe this, me CEO of a multinational corporation is struggling to get the words together to talk to this woman who is insignificant to me. I noticed as the woman smiled but suddenly became more reserved and began to fiddle with her hands before pacing slightly in front of me before she began to answer.

"Your battle city tournament years ago, my brother was a duellist in the finals, I asked you to land the blimp to get one of the contestants some medical attention." Battle city... that was so many years ago. The finals, that means she was on the blimp, a part of the virtual nightmare and she must have witnessed my defeat to Yugi. But a brother in the competition, she isn't Ishizu which means she must be Wheelers sister.

"And that's how I know you?" I questioned in disbelief. Though my mind couldn't piece this together my body and heart was longing to hold her, to touch her. My body felt like it had known her a lifetime, not for 5 minutes several years ago. Everything about her was so familiar, so right. Where did I really know her from?

"No, that's not how you know me." I looked back up to meet her hazel eyes. She began to step closer.

"Seto! Seto there you are!" a familiar and irritable voice yelled at me. Turning momentarily to look at the approaching figure of my ex-wife, I looked back and she was gone. She had vanished into the shadows. I turned back to my wife in both irritation and confusion.

"What do you want Tea?" Covering up my irritation was going to be hard but with Syrian not around I didn't have to make an effort to be nice to her.

"Alright Seto calm down, Syrian was just wondering if you were ever going to get here! You promised him you would come you know! One evening in the whole week and you couldn't make it!" She growled. I knew her tone of voice though. She had a plan to get back at me. "I think to repay him you should take the two of us out to dinner now." Knew it! When she said we she meant her. I'm not one to lie, our marriage was never happy, for me anyway. 14 years ago, when I was 18 I made the fateful mistake of taking Tea as my date to a Christmas benefit for my company. One drink too many and we ended up sleeping together, though I still don't believe when she says it wasn't a plan on her part. She fell pregnant and out of honour I married her a month later and stayed married to her for 12 years. Now, at 32, I find myself still going on dates with the one woman that I despise the most. The divorce was me not her and she constantly reminds me of how we should reunite. The only good thing I got out of my painful marriage to her was my son, Syrian, who will one day walk in my footsteps.

"Fine but let's make this quick. Where is Syrian?" I had no problem spending time with my son but not Tea and these days she never gave us a moment alone together. Every meeting we made she had to be there with us. She was using our son as a way to spend more time trying to manipulate me again and it only made me despise her more. She never used to be this manipulative but 12 years of socialising with the upper class society of Domino has ruined her, even Yugi barely spends any time with her anymore.

"Oh didn't I mention he went to stay at a friend's after the concert. But now you've said you're free, we should take the opportunity to catch up. I know a great new restaurant you probably haven't been to yet. Let me treat you!" Restraining myself from strangling this woman right now was proving difficult.

"Treat me, Tea you will be buying this meal with my money." My voice was full of venom but it didn't seem to deter her efforts.

"Oh lighten up Seto! This will be fun, trust me." I highly doubt that.

Just as I suspected the restaurant which she led us to was not secluded or private like she knew I would have liked. It was right in the centre of the city. The paparazzi were everywhere and I knew I would pay for it in tomorrow's gossip columns. The table we were sat at was right by the window so several reporters got their pictures. The food was bad and so was the company. While she was speaking about her life, her ambitions and trying to flirt shamelessly I found my mind wondering back to the auburn haired goddess that I had met just hours ago. I couldn't remove her haunting image from my mind.

"_No, that's not how you know me."_

"Seto are you even listening to me?" Tea questioned. Forcing myself out of my mental shell I turned my attention back to her expectant face.

"Tea, what was the name of that third rate duellist I used to torment back at battle city. Wheeler? Something Wheeler?" She was part of that geek squad maybe she could give me some answers as to the identity of my mysterious visitor.

"Battle city? What the hell are you remembering Battle city for? We were talking about me trying to get a clothing range if you recall Seto." Her voice was aggravating, her posture and attitude were aggravating.

"Just answer the question Tea or I will leave you sitting here like an idiot and the headlines you get tomorrow won't be the ones you were hoping for." Blackmail was not something I approved of but I needed to know her name. She huffed and gave me a dirty roll of her eyes, nothing I wasn't used to.

"I believe you are talking about Joey Wheeler." Joey? Yes that was his name. Now I can hardly believe that I ever had a stupid vendetta against the guy. It seems pathetic even to me now.

"Did he have a sister that was at the tournament? Auburn haired? And just answer the question Tea." She looked at me with calculating eyes, the same eyes I saw the night she got me forever bound to her when I got her pregnant.

"I tell you what Seto, I will tell you everything you want to know about the Wheeler family on one condition. You come home with me tonight, one last time. What do you say?" I wanted to spit my expensive wine out right there and then. I knew her game. The conversation earlier in the meal had revolved around her want for another child and how I should have a daughter or a second heir to secure my "dynasty" as she put it. I wasn't against the idea of another child but not with her, never with her again. I know her now and I know that she is planning to trap me once again with another child. I am Seto Kaiba and I never make the same mistake twice. I also know she had no intention of giving me any information on this mysterious other Wheeler.

"I'll tell you what Tea, you tell me everything I need to know about Wheeler's sister and I'll get you a fashion line. Would you rather influence in the fashion world or a one night stand with me which I promise you won't end the way you plan?" I watched her as she considered the prospect. Women like Tea were only ever after more influence and I was reading her mind as she considered which option she would find came with the most benefits. "If, and _if_ I ever got you pregnant again, I wouldn't stick by you this time. You would be a single, pregnant woman with no chance of finding a rich husband." Her eyes which were once seductive turned bitter. She knew I had her and was now revealing the true Tea Kaiba. She sighed in defeat.

"I haven't seen her for years, she went all reclusive on us, and well on me it appears. She is slightly younger by about 4 years, long auburn hair but to be honest no-one knows where she is. She got married in her early 20's to some archaeologist named Daniel but god knows if they're still together. Anyway she hasn't been near Domino for nearly a decade now so why has she suddenly sprung up?" I could tell when Tea was lying or withholding information. Tea wouldn't even tell me the girl's name, and I knew why. She thought that I was interested in her and that she would be competition for Tea. Both true but I had to convince her otherwise because there was no way in hell I would sleep with her to get the answers I needed.

"Well it appears she works for a business in America which I am trying to take down. She is some representative which is going to be sent to Domino. Being the ruthless business man that I am, I need to know everything about her in order to take her and her company down. You could really help me Tea." A sparkle emitted in her eyes. If there was one thing that I knew it was that Tea loved to be involved in my business. It made her feel valued and gave her an ego boost as she thought it meant that I was taking her seriously. I had her where I wanted her and she was about to tell me everything I needed to know.

"Well, though her surname was Wheeler at Battle City she changed it after she got married. She was Serenity Cortez last I heard but there was a rumour going round that her husband died about 4 years into the marriage. She never came back to Domino to see her brother or friends and everyone just guessed it was because she was depressed or something. Then Yami was in Tunisia about a year ago and he said that she was there on some archaeological dig. Serenity was never an archaeologist but she was finishing the work which her ex-husband started according to Yami. But that's all I know she must have gone back to the States, her husband was American after all." Serenity, so her name was Serenity. It suited her. Tea had just led me to my next clue, Yami. Knowing Yami he must know more than he is letting on. Tea looked back at me with a seductive smirk. I laughed, a menacing laugh as she looked at me with surprise.

"Thank-you Tea, now if you'll excuse me I have to make a phone call." With that I got up, left a wodge of money on the table and stormed out of the restaurant and out of her life.

Was 1'o'clock in the morning a reasonable hour to call? I couldn't get this woman out of my head. Serenity Wheeler. She was perfect and a massive headache in one! What did she mean I swear I can't remember ever meeting her other than at battle city. I would have remembered her! Yugi had to still be up now, or if he wasn't that other Yugi would be. It was weird how suddenly there were two of them, one slightly taller, with their own bodies. I dialled the number and awaited an answer.

"Hello," a tired voice answered.

"Is that Yugi, or the other one?" I answered abruptly.

"It's Yami, and Kaiba is that you? Why in god's name are you calling at this hour?" The tiredness had now been replaced with curiosity.

"I need you to tell me where I can find Serenity," I stated as emotionlessly as possible.

"Serenity? You mean Serenity as in Joey's sister Serenity," Yami questioned. I sighed in deep frustration.

"What other Serenity do you know? Tea said you were the last person to see her before tonight, do you have any idea how I can find her?" The desperation was etching its way into my voice.

"Wait a second Kaiba, you've seen Serenity? You saw her tonight?" His obliviousness was bothering me and I was not a man who liked repeating himself.

"Yes but she disappeared just as quickly as she spoke to me. I need to find her Yami!" I was close to begging but even I wouldn't lower myself to that. Well maybe I might if it meant finding her.

"Kaiba I have to warn you about getting involved with her, last I saw her she wasn't thinking straight. She was desperate, in my opinion, to rewrite her life. She was claiming that nothing was real. I believe the death of her husband must have affected her deeply. Though she's a friend, my advice is to not go searching for her," Yami warned.

"Maybe she isn't grieving, maybe she just completed the work her husband started. She claimed that I knew her already, from somewhere else and I believed her. Maybe she is right, maybe this isn't real. Maybe we all belong in a different life," I wondered, immediately regretting speaking my private thoughts to my greatest rival. I heard Yami sigh.

"Kaiba we all have regrets, maybe you more than others. I know you never wanted to spend the majority of your life married to a woman whom you despised but following Serenity and letting her talk you into believing that you have a different destiny is not the way. What happened, happened, nothing can change the past." He was talking sense, that much I knew, and I also knew he had no idea how to find Serenity. What I did know was that the feeling I felt the moment I met her was stronger than the reason in my mind. My instinct was telling me to follow her and I always trusted my instinct.

"Thank you for the advice Yami but my private life is of no concern of yours, good night." With that I hung up the phone and gave an exasperated sigh. How the hell am I meant to find this woman?

"_Tell me I'll see you again?" She asked, defeat and hope ridden across her face. After all I had done to her, put her through she still wanted to stay with me. I owed her and now I had the opportunity to give her a different life. A life where she wouldn't end up here, with me. A life where she could marry, have children and be normal. I would do this, for her. The only person left in the world that matters to me. My silence answered the question for her. I honestly did not know if I would ever hold her in my arms again. All I knew was that it was over for us in this life. I held her close and pulled her towards my body in a close embrace. Searching for her lips I passionately kissed her for the last time. When we broke apart I could barely control my breathing._

"_I love you," Serenity whispered. I smiled, my last ever true smile._

"_And I love you!" _

I stumbled back into consciousness. What was that? Was it real? I knew her. I loved her. But when? I remembered. I remembered the true emotion of love. Something I have never felt in this world but which my body knew that I had already experienced. But with Serenity Wheeler? Where is the sense in this? The sudden revelation was making my head spin and the temperature here at my office, where I lived these days was making me gasp for air. I needed fresh air so I made my way down the towering office building to the streets below. The night was beautiful and being outside made me feel a hell of a lot better. The night sky was perfect, if only I wasn't alone. My whole life, even in marriage, it felt like I was alone. There was never someone there who truly understood me. Maybe that's what this feeling is. My longing to be with someone special was making me conjure up this allusion of a life with a perfect woman. Hell maybe I never even saw Serenity tonight. I just conjured up something in my imagination to help me sleep better.

Glancing around the empty streets I suddenly noticed the figure of a girl hunched over the bus stop bench. Waiting for a bus at this hour was ludicrous! There wouldn't be another bus till 6 am and it was barely 2 in the morning.

"You do realise that there won't be a bus for at least another 4 hours?" I spoke in a rude tone of voice. Belittling people was a favourite past time of mine to make myself feel better. She turned to my voice then and I saw her. It was Serenity and she looked more beautiful than ever.

"And what makes you think I'm waiting for a bus?" she smirked. I couldn't help but smile as I approached her. She eyed me until I was standing in front of her seated form.

"Yami tells me I should stay away from you. He implies that you're deluded." She chuckled lightly, her eyes sparkling.

"But you don't believe him. Otherwise you wouldn't be awake at this hour in the morning, pondering over my mysterious appearance a few hours ago." Though her words were light I knew they held a deeper meaning. "Do you remember me, Seto?" The sound of my name rolling off her tongue just felt so right.

"I remember this feeling, this love and it all connects to you. I remember saying goodbye, I remember kissing you but I can't remember how or why or when! Tell me it's true, that this isn't some form of fantasy I have created because I'm so depressed in my own sorry life," I begged for the first time in my life. She looked at me shocked and stood right in front of me, starring deep into my eyes.

"But you made it this way Seto! You made it so that we would have never happened. You promised me that I would be happier this way, that everyone would be happier this way! But you're anything but happy. You have everything you ever wanted, a son, and a beautiful wife and yet you aren't happy, why?" Her eyes never left my face as she spoke the confusing array of words.

"_Come on Kaiba be serious," Serenity laughed, "back in the real world you would never look twice at a girl like me. My ambitions involve running around the globe, exploring whereas you want a wife who fits in with the upper class society you come from. Come to think of it Tea Garderner would be the perfect match for you! You want me to set you up when we get back home?" I nearly choked on my water as she laughed at my reaction. Tea? I would never marry that woman in a million years. _

"_Serenity you are mistaken and you seriously underestimate my feelings for you if you believe that I would just push you aside the minute we left this place. You have changed me Serenity and there is no going back for me now."_

"Whoa..." I stumbled back grabbing my head. It was happening again. Serenity reached out and grabbed me by the arm to steady me. Her touch only caused more flashes to rush through my mind, nothing coherent this time though, just images of her and that place. Images of a time when I was happy. I looked back into her eyes which were filled with concern and compassion. I wanted to lose myself in those eyes and give up. Not even work satisfied me anymore and now I was finding that I traded in another life, for this! Why? "Why would I trade what I had with you for this? This living hell?" I gasped in desperation. Serenity stood back then and looked at the ground. She began shifting nervously like she had done the first time we met again just hours before.

"You didn't trade in what you had with me. We were over," she stated solemnly. My eyes implored her to continue. I knew that I would never have left her for the world, not unless... "I mean we didn't choose to be over but there was no way we could be together anymore. You had to choose, we either both died or only one of us died." A soft tear slid down her face. "You're dead Seto." Suddenly I remembered. I had to save her and Mokuba and the only way was to sacrifice my own life so that they would live, so that they would live and leave that place. The last thing I remembered seeing was a plane tear across the sky as I died. I was happy then. I saved her. The memory made a brilliant smile play across my lips until I remembered. Serenity said I was dead, then what did that make her?

"But if I'm dead then what about you?" She smiled then as more tears began to fall down her face. Silent tears. She began wiping them away.

"I'm dead too. Everyone here is dead. This here is a place for finding yourself." She pointed around signally to the world around us. "Everyone here is looking for something. Something they had in another life but you can only realise this once you remember." I looked at her is confusion and sorrow.

"But I saved you Serenity. You were supposed to live. You were meant to be happy and find someone. You were meant to travel. You were meant to live for the both of us!" I cried out in despair. If she died then all that I sacrificed was for nothing. She placed another soothing hand on my arm and explained.

"I did live Seto. I died long after you. I married an archaeologist named Daniel, as I did in this life. But the only person ever for me was you. I remembered that and came to find you! To thank you for saving me and to tell you that I always loved you," Serenity whispered as her hand moved up to stroke my cheek. My hand joined hers as I held it in place.

"Then why am I married to Tea with a child. I never married her and I never had a child with her. This life bares no reflection to my desires," I spat out in frustration. The thought of missing out on a second chance with Serenity because I was stuck in some marriage to Tea was creating a deep anger inside of me. Serenity laughed again and attempted to calm me with her hand.

"This is part of Tea's fantasy. She always had a thing for you Kaiba and she dreamt of marrying you and being the envy of the entire female population of Domino. Syrian, your child, isn't your child. He's Tea's child but not yours. When she was alive she was playing the same con on a different man. In this world she had the chance to change her life decisions but she chose the same path. She is going to be here a long-time!" Serenity mused but then continued. "It's like my husband Daniel. We both married before because we had both lost the true person we loved. Knowing we were all we had left back then was enough to keep us together and for us to be happy. In this world though our true lovers were alive again! Our marriage was empty until Daniel found his Charlotte. He didn't die, he just moved on with her." To be honest I stopped listening to Serenity after she mentioned that she loved me more than she loved her husband. My previous frustration was lifted and now I found myself unable to look away from her loving face. Slowly I lowered my lips onto hers and what started as a slow and gentle kiss turned into something else. Desperation and longing were mixed in with passion and hope. We were together again! But for how long? I broke from the kiss and found myself gasping for air as I pulled her close to my chest and began running my fingers through her long auburn locks.

"What now?" I whispered. Serenity pulled back and stared up at me.

"Well we can't go anywhere until the others remember too! And I'm judging that that might take awhile. So for now we wait and enjoy our time together here, before we move on like the others," she spoke back to me.

"Move on where?" I questioned. Not that I had any doubts about my future existence. I knew that I would be with her. That was all that mattered.

"We will have to wait and find out!"

So some of you may have guessed that I based the storyline on the Lost series finale "the end" which despite large criticism I thought it was amazing. This is just a little something I had rattling around in my head. Hope you enjoyed.


End file.
